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These blips didn't give me all the answers, but they did give me my first insight to universal truth. This is what I'll call it for differentiating purposes. Fact truth v. universal truth. Thinking v. feeling, however not to be necessarily be confused with emotion, as emotion can be triggered by thought. As I was saying, the thinking world around me made me question these blips. Inside there was a part of me who knew this to be true, that these blips were not just around for no apparent reason - I knew that they were truth, but I began to question myself and doubt these blips. I still had these truths inside of me, but I questioned them. I came into an internal conflict with myself and due to the inner belief I had that I was "wrong," the affect that this doubt has on me propelled me into further doubt. There were times where I was able to dismiss this doubt, but after a couple of happenings where I was "proven wrong" by my own set of standards on what was "right" and what was "wrong," my self doubt grew and the internal conflict grew to the point where I froze in fear - not knowing which guidance, which "route" to take. I found myself consumed with thought and unable to take action. It was here that a series of events led me to question these beliefs. Where did they come from? Was it social constructs? Was it my peers, my inner circle? Was it in the past? Was it a stranger's experience? Was it things I was seeing on TV, taking in others' opinions and facts as fact, when my heart knew otherwise? When you want to find the truth that lies inside you, ask yourself these questions and dig deep to find the root of these beliefs. Your heart is your best guide and these blips I was getting and still get come from this same space.
The first blip that came to my mind, one of the first universal truths that I had come to me dealt with an object(s) of value to which society has placed such value on. I knew that this was something that was structured as collectively agreed upon, and although I didn't realize it at the time, I had the knowing that this was illusion. It was something that did not exist in "nature" and it was an egoic construct and at any time, said construct could be changed. It can be compared to time as is on a clock. Time doesn't exist, but time does exist. Natural time doesn't exist but the time that we have created does exist. Time that we have created.
Of course, when I opened up about this universal truth, I was met with the belief system that this is the way things are and the way things are is truth. This truth was not something that came from something that I had read. It didn't come from society that's for sure! It did not come from anything that I watched on TV...no...it came from inside of me. Seemingly out of thin air! Like I said before, this rejection of these blips among other things led me to dismiss these truths, but then I found these truths again at an older age.
Looking back now and seeing how I have gone through several realizations - it was this truth that came back. That truth that had been there all along, the truth that never left but was pushed to the back-burner. I had the truth all along, I just was not allowing myself to see this truth and live this truth due to the "truth" I thought to be the truth! It was my intuition, my heart, showing me what the truth really was.
As yourself where this belief is coming from. See if it could have an origin in someone or something else. If it stems from outside, feel how this belief feels - decide who you will trust. Can you trust yourself? Will you allow yourself to trust yourself? Trust is a key ingredient. If it's origin is on the inside; now this sounds cray cray, ask yourself if THAT stems from outside of you. Keep going with it. In the end - you'll arrive at your destination.
There is so much more that I could say about this, because it encompasses so much. I wanted to focus more on intuitive knowing than belief systems about ourselves; it is all connected though. BUT for now, you'll just have to wait for more. <--- There is a lil hint of what's to come.
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